How I feel…Depression
Depression, yes, depression is my healthy issue right now. According to the psychiatrist I have a depression associated with a high level of anxiety.
Years of psychological abuses in the office I was working in by the bosses and the intensification of psychological pressure during the year 2009 just throw me down. I know It was my fault, that I shouldn’t stayed so long in that office but now I have to cure myself because…I don’t want to end up in a mental hospital.
The symptoms were obvious I just tried to forget they existed and I always thought that the next day would be better.
According to the Helpguide.org the Common signs and symptoms of depression are:
- Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
- Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
- Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
- Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).
- Irritability or restlessness. Feeling agitated, restless, or on edge. Your tolerance level is low; everything and everyone gets on your nerves.
- Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
- Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
- Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.
- Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.
I had all symptoms. Regarding the weight change for me meant a weight loss. Regarding the sleep changes, I started with hypersomnia, dreams and nightmares.
Even with medication the nightmares are not gone yet. They are always work related, boss related, usually they are violent, aggressive what causes me a real headache when I wake up. Why don’t I dream with Brad Pitt or some one that uses the best testosterone boosters? Well, it’s easy to understand. Last year I suffered from daily pressure from my boss, aggressively was the main action towards me, so now, I feel my brain is so “damaged” by that, that my fears come in my nightmares.
I know the cause of my depression so I have to get rid of it, I have to wait a few more months until everything ends but for now I’m home on a medical leave.
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Keep yourself busy in the activities you love and do a regular brisk walk for 40 minutes. The improved blood circulation will help.